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English at work

"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." Churchill

Signs that you drink too much coffee:

  1. Instant coffee takes too long.
  2. Your only food source is cream and sugar.
  3. You lick your coffee cup clean.
  4. When you sneeze, your eyes stay open.
  5. You go to Alcoholics Anonymous just for the free coffee.
  6. You introduce your husband/wife as your “Coffee-mate”
  7. You sleep only so you can wake up to smell the coffee.
  8. You don’t tan, you roast.

The village blacksmith finds an apprentice who is willing to work hard. The blacksmith shows the boy the fire and the anvil next to the fire. He gives the boy a heavy hammer and says: „When I take the horseshoe out of the fire, I’ll lay it on the anvil. When I nod my head, you hit it with the hammer.“ The apprentice follows the instruction exactly. Now he is the village blacksmith.

Noticing that his son is doing his homework while watching TV, listening to music and chatting online, a father says, „When Abraham Lincoln was your age, he was reading books by the light of fire.“ The son replies, „When Abraham Lincoln was your age, he was president of the United States.“